[Short Stories] – December

One day, when everything gets better, it means something’s gone wrong. Your life might keep on moving on anyway till the wind of changes comes and dusts off some pieces of colorful coverage. It’s now the time you had to get rid of fake smiles and drown into drinks of sorrow yourself. And with a little luck, you’ll find nothing but a hard way to believe in this living…

It’s been such a long long time since the last night stroll throughout this city of strangers months ago. This time may be another but call me back to the thrones I tried to seize in vain.

December rains might be a little kind like knives to my bones, but I knew everything would be in the way soon. Despite the heavy downpour, forgetting about the lasting sickness , the screaming hunger as well as a little bit complication inside, I rode my motorbike cutting through the night to get back into a same old nostalgia, as something began to seep from my veins.

Although I didn’t like this city much, this place was really for me and my troubles unspoken. As long as the city lights were on, I was still able to rely on one thing that never faded away at night When the rain abated, I suddenly recalled a quite old song and started crooning that over and over for the sufferings arising. For a while, I didn’t help but feeling like the song was trying to bring the melancholiness into the streams awaiting to run all over the face.

Only when I exhaled the last note did I know I was overwhelmed by my own emotions. Tears fell, time stopped, and sparks flew like electricity. If only I had been strong enough to hold it back, not beneath the faraway stars,… But it’s alright in the end, wasn’t it ?

A sad December, just not as joyful as the time when the maturity was yet to cover up a foolish youth of sorrow, it’s all about someone in the middle of somewhere getting lost in a moment of December who always felt really off balances and out of tune and went on grumbling the following days.

Cold as ice, light as a feather, the winter winds blew – and perhaps off my mind in an awkward manner – imagining that unexpectedly a whole season of coziness showed up like it had never been there before, and then I realized the so-called thing hadn’t existed to me as ever, even December winters ago. And “what will be will be”, I was done thinking so, with the unfulfilled feelings and the upcoming breakdowns.

Looking beyond the streets with flocks of people rushing home, I wanted to jump on the last bus and indulged in the peacefulness of my own home at that moment. When there’s nowhere to hide, nothing to lean on, nobody to trust, it would always be the last but the best to look back, and the kid once again called his mama and courted fondling a little. The rains stopped completely to wake me up out of my dreams, and I was way reluctant to getting up, merely managing to whisper a cry for helps. But no one ever heard,…

 

[Short Stories] – December

A sad December, just a little hurry in the last days of winter unintentionally erased away one belief remaining deep inside a broken heart, it’s all about when stepping into a small café, picking up and stirring a hot cup of black coffee, I somehow recollected that this place seemed to have been in my memories, but it turned out to be familiarly strange.

Sitting alone at a corner, I kept listening to that same old song repeatedly while twiddling the earphone : that made me quite bitterly cold and anxious. Out there through the window panes, ordinary people often tried to find out the things they wanted, they lost, and they abandoned, till the moment all they had ever desired for was beaten, buried and forgotten by something new and more ambitious.

Unlike them, hiding behind the dark-colored curtains, I kept on playing at the table by turning my hourglass of oblivion upside down in order to lose all I had ever had once again. I flashed my selfish past in my daily silly flows of thought and watched those haunting echoes hitting bouncing off the crumpled heart, and in the nick of time, I could feel the faint breathtakingly, with clarity. Abruptly, the spoon fell over the hard ground but nobody paid just the littlest attention…

A sad December, just a little bit tired of what I once considered true happiness, until the moment things turned crystal clear : among thousands of heartless people, there was only one emotionless person looking down on the heavens. Walking round the circles, along the dark deserted roads, I seemed not to be capable of finding out what I was thinking of, speechlessly looked at the horizon to wait for an old blurred image painted full of lies that was previously sketched by faiths.

There flashed a sudden smile for a while and the footsteps continued to stomp over some thorns to make a way out of these messes. It hurted outside but healed a little breaks inside. On the memory- covered paths meant to be wished and desired, I just wanted to reverse the time and go back to the start where not all the endings would be fulfilled happily.

There would be new faces, new relationships, new loves and sometimes new lonelinesses; so without fail, I spent a series of new days sitting by the window, singing the sorrows out loud like crazy. In some ways, today would be one day’s yesterday, the cut might be the first and be the deepest, but finally from the bottom of a broken love remained a little old boy who never got trapped in emotional vortex any longer.The rain didn’t seem bother to fall, I didn’t need to bury the hatchet, and people didn’t mind to remember.

Dropping everything and turning back in the last pouring rain of winter, nostalgias turned sleepless nights to a harassing longing, lonesome bitterness to unforgivable mistakes, and any one word to an ignorant goodbye, by some means.Through the grapevine, words like knives might chase me down at the very edge but I knew it all along that rather than being hurt, I would hurt myself. No more poison could kill my emotions because they’re all already intoxicated…

If only it wouldn’t be a collision of two…

For a strength to be strong…

[This note is totally a collection of moments and stories I’ve ever been told, seen, and experienced. It may lack some needed connections for full understanding but if you once got into the same feelings, you would probably realize something hidden in every sentence.]

 

At the hideaway of Qui Dinh